Personal Testimony about Abortion

Abortion Testimony-Leslie Gydos 

Well reading the other testimonies, mine is much the same. Those of you, who have been through it, know the pain. Mine was over 13 years ago. The pain fades a bit over time, though only through the Blood of Jesus and his mercy on our memories. When I got pregnant I was 24 years old. I had moved up to Philadelphia after graduating college. I went there to follow a boy, a man, I guess. He was 25 or so. I was in love with him and had dated and lived together with him for 3 years. I thought he was ideal. But he did not love me the same way. He had tried to tell me many times, but I was needy and clingy. I did not have a relationship with God or even know Him at the time. For my education, I had attended 2 liberal schools the first, a college, then I transferred to a big University where I met this Guy.

I followed him like a pathetic clinging vine to Philly. I got a job there at a big Investment Banking Firm and worked as Admin. Asst. to a senior VP. That was wild, working for Investment Bankers…learned a lot. Long story short. Later that year, I found out I was pregnant. His first thought was abortion. I was dumbstruck. I was in disbelief. Part of me really wanted to get married and have the baby.  But, because of my liberal, humanistic education and liberal/ somewhat feminist upbringing by a single parent. I honestly believed the lies I was told in Biology about the Fetus being a clump of cells and a “blob” really. So this was my background, thought-wise. Bad set-up for getting an abortion! Looking back upon this has angered me over the years, still knowing that Darwinism and Evolution are still being taught in our public schools. What a Tragedy!

Growing up I knew about Jesus. Heck, my birthday is at Christmas time. So Yeah, Baby Jesus, and “Jesus Loves Me, this I know…” But I did not KNOW HIM PERSONALLY. So I had the abortion. What a tragedy! Yes, I suffered, due to my ignorance. But it (the abortion) woke me up to the TRUTH (Jesus) and other truths about what Life really is.

I guess when one experiences life being torn from one’s body in a violent murderous way, then one’s EYES ARE OPENED> But it was too late for my baby. The “doctor” did the “procedure” fast, probably because the doctor could not stand the continuous sounds of my loud SCREAMING. On the way to the “recovery” room I had to stop in the bathroom. There I found a piece of my baby’s skull inside of my vagina; it came out when I urinated. GNARLY HUH? WELL SATAN WAS HAVING A FIELD DAY WITH ME THAT DAY.

I will tell you- I went into that clinic thinking I would just ask some questions and find out more about abortion… When I walked in the clinic my mind was not made up, but once I was inside there was no escape for me! The people who worked there at the WOMEN’S PAVILLION, on Elm Street in Greensboro talked to me and coerced me along with my boyfriend into having the abortion. It was sort of like they describe a car accident. Things seemed unreal and seemed to be happening in slow motion. Things that happened should have made me run out of there, but I suppose a feeling of powerlessness came over me.  I heard the sound of the suction or vacuum machine, which they use to suction out the unborn babies, yet I stayed. I got an ultrasound so they could see the position of the baby (in order to efficiently kill it) I asked what the sex of the baby was. The staff person told me they were not allowed to tell me that. That was probably one of the worst parts-being denied the knowledge of knowing whether my child was a boy or a girl. In retrospect, I believe that had they told me the sex of the baby, I would not have been able to go through with it. But, of course, they are trained to lie, deny, in order to kill babies. One of the oddest parts of the whole clinic experiences was the woman who was in the abortion room with me and held my hand while my baby was being aborted.  I look back on that and wonder…Who was that woman? Why was she there? She really did not say anything, but looked in my eyes while I screamed and held my hand. I wonder if she was an angel in disguise or a demon in disguise. How did she have the guts to stand there and watch all of that happen, I still wonder? Either she was an angel of God, who was sent to be there perhaps to pray for me. Or she was a Pro-Choice volunteer, who really believed women had the right to kill their babies and she wanted to support that.  Maybe I will never know about her…And when I was finally allowed out of the “recovery” or post butchery room. I ran out of there as fast as I could and when I got to the stairwell, I was screaming at the top of my lungs. My boyfriend’s reaction to all this? He was laughing. I guess his mind could not comprehend what was happening with me, and he had the inappropriate emotional reaction of laughter. But to me that laugh was a laugh of satan. In retrospect I knew satan was laughing at me that day.

After the abortion, I had PTSD or PAS. I literally cried for three years solid.  Plus, I got Pelvic Inflammatory, severe pelvic pain, and spotting. Only Jesus was able over time to heal me of those wounds (mental, spiritual, physical, emotional).  But I have to tell you people- abortion messes with your mind BIG TIME> The only way back was JESUS. I don’t know how a woman can cope with what she has done, without the redemptive power of Jesus!

I hope my story is illustrative of the reality of abortion. This is real hell on earth for women and death for their unborn babies. One cannot understand if one has no reference point, so I hope my story will give you a reference point.

If one grows up without a Father in the home and a single mother who must work full time to make ends meet; A girl can grow up with such little self worth that she can find herself in the place of an unplanned pregnancy.

From other testimonies I have read many women say they were stupid. Well, I am sure you felt that way. But you need to also realize you were also a victim, you were deceived, at least in part. Even if you say you “knew” what you were getting into and did it anyhow> Until that horrible violation happens- you truly don’t and cannot know what ABORTION is. I once called it being raped by Satan. The Death spirit is most definitely present in the abortion chamber. It is a satanic place. What did he do in there to us? He robbed, killed, and destroyed our babies. The enemy tried to get our souls!  But the good and awesome news is that his time is short and satan will never win!  Jesus Rules and HE is coming soon.

I hope that the poor souls including myself that committed the sin of sex outside of marriage or whatever other sins and mis-fortunes and snares of satan lead us to allow this unthinkable horror to happen to our bodies and minds; That we can be and are now FREE IN JESUS. His Blood washes away all sin, even the sin abortion.

Please if you do not have a saving knowledge of Jesus, cry out to Him now ask forgiveness for all of your sins. He will come into your heart and life and SAVE YOU for all eternity with HIM in HEAVEN.

I did it over 12 years ago. And though I truly regret the abortion, I don’t regret that my Savior used that wretchedness to save a wretch like me!

Praise Jesus!
Leslie Gydos

I found this powerful video on YouTube. It vividly illustrates, yet more mildly than reality (for me) the Loss a woman suffers after going through with an abortion.



2 Responses

  1. Well Leslie…I can say you are a strong woman and your story moved me to tears. That is what I’m talking about (the curch thing) in my email. This is a moving testimony and I could feel your pain as I read the words. My tears flow for your baby and mine and we both know that one day we will be with our beautiful babies and be showered with their love. Leslie, you’re such a good person and I know the pain you hold inside…I always think of the son I never got to have too. The pain is overwhelming I know, but some day we will be with our babies and I hope God will forgive me…although I can NEVER and will NEVER forgive myself.

  2. Leslie, while I do not share your views, by sharing your experience, you are relaying to girls that there is another kind of choice. I have felt the pain and sadness of abortion, but for me at the time, it was the right thing for me and I stand by it. Do I have regrets?…Of course. Do I wander about the child that almost was?…Of course I do. Sometimes, the pain I keep inside is so great I want into the woods and scream at the top of my lungs, but all I have to do is look at my daughter (who is a preteen) and think how truly blessed and lucky I am. I think it is great that you are standing up for what you believe in by delivering such a powerful message, one that I hope will be around for many years to come.

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